FYI

Most of what I write these days, I "publish" on my blog and in less than 24 hours I return it to draft form... So, just in case you are wondering why one moment you thought you read something new and the next moment you are only seeing something from a few months earlier... now you know...  As I've said since the mid-90s, "My best writings appear in my mind while walking, exercising, working intensely or driving, when it is impossible for me to pick up a notebook... and I always say that I will return to the idea, theme, mood... and I never do."  

When I first created this blog... and no, I will not mention James or Natalie... I was using it as a basic rough-draft of a life story I thought would be interesting for many people and helpful for many others...  Most of my life I've dreamed of writing something "important"... And, yes, I believe that much of my experience, evolution, ideas and discoveries are very important.  However, at this moment in time, I don't find any sign that I am anything more than a mediocre writer and I've never seen a sign that I could turn my experience and ideas into autobiographical fiction that would entice a very wide readership...  

Anything less than historical or autobiographical fiction would be a failure and I have no interest in writing an "inspirational" book...  I'm not trying to sell a product.  Plus, my interests and perspectives are very broad and changing.  For instance, due to the intense work in October, I haven't returned to my investigation into health and diet.  I haven't returned to my 10k runs (although I ran 5k yesterday and bought a Concept 2 rowing machine for those inclement or busy days difficult for trecking out to the park).  Since Angelina's death last December 9th, I haven't returned to painting.  Due to our extreme dietary change, I spend a bit less time in the kitchen... although today I am preparing Kimchi for the first time in my life... based upon information about fermented vegetables and digestive health etc....  And although I haven't returned to the investigation, I have become a momentary fanatic about Vitamin A (immune system) in the diet.  Eat your orange sweet potatoes and your butternut squash before you eat your carrots.  But, always accompany those extremely high sources of Vitamin A with a fat source, since Vitamin A is not water soluble...  And, another thing kids, like bananas and potassium, you've been misled about carrots and eyesight...  There are two types of Vitamin A.  Vitamin A from yellow or orange or green leafy vegetables strengthens your immune system.  Vitamin A from animal protein protects or strengthens your eyesight...  Carve the pumpkin and then eat it... but eat it with a lot of butter or olive oil or macadamia nuts or avocado or chedder cheese or... But eat it...  

And what am I reading today?  Miguel Angel Asturias... Nobel winning author from Guatamala (awarded before Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Mario Vargas Llosa, Pablo Neruda or Octavio Paz)... I'm struggling to enter his Banana Republic trilogy.  After reading "Dr. Jivago" by Boris Pasternak, it was such a tragic, romantic, informative, sad and beautiful piece of writing that could have had him executed...  I find Asturias' piece very impersonal and lacking warmth.  But, it could just be an issue of adjustment.  The truth is that I struggled heavily with the beginning of "Dr. Jhivago"...  It smacked too much of Victorian era writings describing the wealth and comfort of the pre-bolschevic Moscow "middle-class"...  But WHAT AN INCREDIBLE JUXTAPOSITION!  And Pasternak bringing us directly into the reality of change in Russian experience between the Revolution of 1905 and the decade after WWI and the Civil War...  Bringing us into that reality without showing a party line etc...  Sad, Sad, Sad.  

Dr. Jhivago a doctor turned writer/poet basically dying in the streets of Moscow, basically unknown in life...  although greatly loved and incredibly considerate.  Boris Pasternak, soviet writer, son of upper-middle class post-impressionist Russian Jewish painter Leonid Pasternak who was close friends with Russian writer Leo Tolstoi... Boris Pasternak, on Stalin's list of writers who should be imprisoned and executed and who wouldn't live to see any of his books published in the country within which he lived and who taught us to be true to our inner beliefs no matter how risky they are...  His writings were black listed not because they were subversive, but (as clearly displayed in Dr. Jhivago) because he displayed too much independent thinking...  

Boris Pasternak was one of three Nobel Awarded Soviet writers that included Alexandr Solzhenitsen and Michail Sholokhov (only Sholokhov was allowed to receive the award).